How do you know?

My husband and I haven't been married long; less than a year. We said before we got married, we would wait 1 year, and start trying for a baby. (so now, EVERYONE has their hopes up for this :) But how do you know when the time is right to have a baby? We're not rich, but we both have great jobs and make decent money, we have a house big enough for a child, our families are both close by, etc. I'm sort of doubting that we should start trying at that 1 year mark simply b/c I just don't know if it's right! I really don't think my husband is ready, but then again, I don't know if he ever would be ready...he would NEVER say, "hey lets have a baby". (it took him 4 1/2 years to be ready to get married!) I know it's something we would never regret (who regrets having a baby? Even teenagers say they wouldn't change it for anything). We have a few kinks in our marriage that need to be worked out first, but who doesn't??? All of our friends have kids, and if we wait too long, our kid won't have any friends to play with b/c they'll be too old!! ha ha jk. This subject has been bothering me for a few weeks now, so any advice would be greatly appreciated! How did y'all know when the time was right? Will we "just know" (which is what some people have told me), or will it just happen? I know really it is up to God, but I'd like to have some say in this plan :)

Happy Holidays (???)

There was a time that I looked forward to Thanksgiving and Christmas. I LOVED knowing that I would get to spend time with my whole family sitting around the dinner table sharing stories of the past, playing games after dinner, taking afternoon naps, not worrying about a thing other than enjoying the moment and those around me. I miss those days.

Since I married my wonderful husband (no sarcasm there, he IS wonderful) and now that we have children, I HATE the holidays. Since we are "blessed" that both of our families live about 2 hours for each other, we run around the state trying to make ALL of the events so everyone is happy. However, WE are not happy and I hate it. I know what you are thinking, just eliminate some of the events we go to, well easier said than done. Let me explain....

My husband doesn't have much family. It's his parents, his sibling and that sibling's family, and a cousin and her family, so we can't be the only ones NOT to show up. I have my parents, 3 other siblings who are married and 2 of these siblings live a LONG way away, so I ONLY see them for Thanksgiving OR Christmas (so once a year), and then my grandmother (my grandfather passed away 4 years ago). I refuse to miss hanging out with those siblings that live FAR away, and I would never miss my grandmother's house since I know the holidays are the hardest time of the year for her.

I don't get along with my inlaws, especially my mother in law. The thought of her makes me nauseated, literally! I have prayed about this, I have sat her down to talk to her, I have forgiven her SEVERAL times, but we just don't get along. She doesn't plan and she pitches a fit when she calls the week of Thanksgiving or Christmas, gives us a time to be at her house and we tell her that we have to be at my parent's house that time or at my grandmother's house or something. This causes fighting between my husband and I EVERY year too.

Since last Christmas, I have only seen her 3 times and she lives in the SAME town as I do. She complains that she never sees her grandkids, but she doesn't even come over!

My husband's family aren't the only issue, my mom makes it hard too. She has never had to deal with inlaws because my dad's parents both died before they married. So, when my husband and I are driving back and forth to everyone's house TRYING to make everyone happy, my mom still complains because 'we aren't staying long enough. SIGH!!!!

I don't even like to shop for Christmas anymore. I wish everyone in both of our families would agree to do away with the gifts (except for kids or something). For the past 2 years I have asked everyone what we gave them the past year and there has only been 1 person that has told me the correct thing in TWO years!!!! REALLY!!?!?!? So on top of not getting that quality time with our families anymore, now we spend tons of money on things people don't even remember or appreciate.

I don't have an answer as to what my husband can do to make things better, but something has to give. I can't deal with this crap every year. Am I alone in this holiday drama? I already have a negative attitude and it's not even November. I just wish I could keep my family at home during Christmas playing with the kids new toys, cooking a huge meal, and do nothing!! Last year I was pregnant during Thanksgiving and Christmas, so I used that as an excuse to not travel even though my dr. told me it was okay. I know...horrible, but it worked! AND it was great! However, I will not be pregnant this year, so can't use that again.

I am sure I have given enough details in my situation that some of you know who I am, but oh well. Give me some good advice on how to remedy this situation. I need some help!!

Confessions of Mothers

It has been a long time since someone has posted anything on here. I thought it would be fun to do "Confessions from Mothers."

So many times Mom's get down on themselves because they do something ridiculous, or they do something that they would never tell anyone. But guess what? We all do these things. So I think we should leave comments and confess something crazy/embarrassing/awful that we have done as a mom. I bet they will be funny, and if you really think about it then it probably was not the worst thing in the world.

Here are a few of mine.

I was changing a diaper, dirty diaper, in a parking lot one time. I realized I did not have any wipes. I had no choice but to put the new diaper on without cleaning it up. It was nasty and awful, but in the end it was ok. Now I check for wipes twice before I leave.

I have gotten so aggravated with my child that I pinched her to see if she would stop crying. I didn't mean to, and felt so bad, but I still did it. I doubt I will do that again, I had just had enough.

Those are just two, I am sure there are many more. I hope that all of you moms will leave a comment confessing something. I think it will remind all of us that we all struggle and we are all trying to do this thing the best we can. Can't wait to hear some of your confessions!

Snotty?

I have this person who is interested in pursuing a relationship with me but for some reason I can't get past a few things ..

1. We graduated high school the same year and he has not done anything since then. He says he is going to start school but who knows.
2. I don't feel as if we are in the same place in life. I have a degree, working full time, and looking into going back to school for nursing or medicine. He doesn't have a job isn't
3. He has already told me he wants to marry me and does not know me as a person.
4. Everyone says I would be good for him, but what about the other way around.

What would you do if you were me? I know sometimes God has different plans, but I want to be in a meaningful relationship in which we are both good for each other. I am quite tired of hearing everyone say I would be good for him because I am so grounded, yada yada yada. Education is important I don't want to lower my standards in that area, and having a passion is important. I sounds so snotty. :(

9 Words Women Use

I think this is hilarious and perfect. My husband sent this to me and all I could do was shake my head and agree with it. Now if they could just memorize it then we would all be just fine. Enjoy!

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome'. That will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying F-- YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to #3.

The big O

I just have a question for all of you readers. There are several of us who are really struggling with the sex thing and we are not able to orgasm. There, I said it. If any of you have any tips they would be greatly appreciated or you could write a post on it. It is just really hard to have sex night after night and not be able to make it work. Tips?

The need to feel NEEDED?

Can anyone tell me why I feel the need to be loved or wanted or needed by friends and family?

I feel as though if I call/text/email something that is nice, sweet, caring, etc. I should get something in return. Not like the same thing I sent but at least a thank you. I guess in my mind that is the respectful thing to do. Am I wrong?

I have this in my head that if someone sends me something nice or to that nature, I say thank you or if it touched my heart tell them so.

I look at it this way.....we are not promised tomorrow. So, if something is on my heart I need to speak it. Things like I love you, etc. And when I don't get a response I feel like they don't feel the same, etc.

I read Tanna's blog on faithfulness and it made me think if I had people like that in my life. I mean I THINK I do, but then it's like...well, do I really? And it makes me sad.

Would anyone really care if I was gone? I don't feel as if they would.

I have this need to be needed. To be loved, to be wanted, to just be something to someone. Shouldn't all I care about is that God loves me, God needs me, that I AM something to Him. That is all I should care about but it's not.